Sitting at the kitchen table thinking about the snow, my family and the tugs and pulls of making art, when other things are going on in my life.
I wish I could think about the art I sold in the studio, last year. I wish I could stay with the wonderful conversations that I had with studio customers about the art. And focus on working with my hands outside of the kitchen, laundry room, and overall domestic scene.
What I know to be true for me is, when it snows and when family members return home, it is amazing how fast I revert to an earlier time in my life, when cooking and creating a nurturing environment for my kids and husband, was the main preoccupation.
I feel as if I am in art hibernation, as I make the veggie soups, hot tea, pancakes and other comfort foods for my son and husband.
An adult son has returned home, emotionally bruised, He is an Iraq war vet. So life for him is often difficult and exhausting. We try to hlep him problem solve, we loan him our car, we pack him food and buy him clothes and other essentials. How I wish these creature comforts could solve his problems. Unfortunately, they only help around the edges.
He is a sweetie but he is tormented by anxiety and nightmares about the war. He doesn’t get much of a break from these worries. so it is hard to focus on going out to the studio, when all I want to do is make his life easier and help him find peace and joy.
The art will come, the drawings will start, and I will discipline myself to do my work. Art can be a refuge at times like this, I hope it will help me through, as it has so many times in the past.
Here he is bringing in more firewood, I need to take a step back in to the art. Along with making soups and breads.